Michael Sikkema
Double Features
The Beast in the Birds
Naughty nurse and Harley grandpa
done wrong by hilltop landlord
tinker w/ garden-use flamethrower
leave a trail of cadaver dicks
The Chosen One
Kinda clumsy karate guy
roundhouse kicks a king cobra
into fiery quicksand, nicely
surrounded by a bunch of explosions
†
The Devil’s U-Turn
37 cars filled with C4
collide with a neon helicopter
on a freeway so busy, shrouded
satanists can barely BBQ babies
Fiends in Need
Fangy mucus mummies just kinda
fuck everything up, mostly at Lou’s Diner
but especially at the swimming pool
where everyone saves everyone’s lives
†
In the Changing Fog
Flannel shoulder pad lady
inherits the family castle
The clouds don’t act right
Somehow nothing happens
Operation Scorpion Egg
We got a bunch of mustaches
even more army assholes
and freakishly large seedpods
asked to pull a lot of weight
†
Danny’s Dollies
Mellified men, wax figures, scarecrows
mannikins, crash test or CPR dummies
effigies, cardboard cutouts, mattress lumps
they all start looking good after a while
Alpha Rise
Mostly they dance in those black robes that
they found in the barn, stick close to the peepholes
and the sacred book, have shockingly vanilla sex
mostly they bicker and turn into wolves
Michael Sikkema writes about the natural and supernatural and the bridge between. He also writes about other things but these bios are supposed to be succinct. He is the author of Half an Owl in Garden Light, published by Alien Buddha Press in 2021, and Caw Caw Phony, out from Trembling Pillow Press in 2022. Without provocation, he will readily declare Halloween III superior to all other Halloween sequels, and creature features, as a subgenre, superior to slashers as a subgenre.